Pants on fire

It would appear that our friend Mr. Jackson Wasser (pictured with superhero friends), is enjoying a lying phase. I consulted renowned child psychologist Dr. Google, and he says that such a phase is common among preschoolers and can take two forms: tall tales and attempts to get out of trouble. Jack, gifted child that he is, employs both techniques.

Steve and Jack went to a Halloween party on Saturday while I was volunteering. Jack told me that he was very nice at the parade and shared his candy with other kids, including "some kids who had broken legs and could not get their own candy." I told him that was very nice and that I was proud of him. I was less proud when Steve told me that Jack did share his candy with other kids, but that there were no kids with broken legs.

Yeah.

Then, Steve discovered some marks in black pen on the back of the bathroom door. Turns out that Jack is some kind of graffiti prodigy. I confronted Jack with the evidence and he swore that he didn't do it. He was so adamant and so stubborn in not admitting any kind of wrongdoing that I think he could have passed a polygraph test. Dr. Google says this is common - kids Jack's age work so hard to lie to get themselves out of trouble that they believe it themselves.

Dr. Google further says that preschool aged kids are not quite ready developmentally to understand that lying is wrong. I shouldn't let it go, but I shouldn't make a big deal out of it either. Good thing, because I have some kids with broken legs to give candy to.

Race Report: Bix 7

I had big plans for this year's Bix 7. I was going to smash my PR of 1:06:58 and run it in 1:03. I was pretty sure I could do it - I recently ran a 10 miler at 9:02 pace. Subtract three miles and add in crowds and hills, and it seemed challenging, but possible.

But plans change. What was going to be a tough race turned into a weekend of running with my guys.

Friday night was the Junior Bix. Jack was incredibly pumped for his race. I got him dressed in his Quad Cities Micro Marathon t-shirt, since Jack is certainly not going to run wearing the race t-shirt, a fact that the vast majority of the other kids were clearly unaware of. Amateurs! On the walk from the car to the starting line, Jack asked me at least three times if I would run the race with him. Every time, I answered, "Yes, if you want me to. Or if you want to run by yourself, that's fine too."

Jack insisted that we would run together - and we did, holding hands the whole way. Running with Jack is good for my spirit. All I need to do is see the joy on his face as he races to the finish line and the pride he feels upon finishing and I am reminded of my own love for the sport.

As for Steve, he was more nervous about the big race on Saturday. Last year, he ran the race despite not training well, and he suffered for it. Steve announced months ago that his goal was to run the Bix without feeling like he was going to die afterwards - and enlisted me as his coach. I put him through a series of long runs of gradually increasing distances, intermixed with the Gentleman's Three (a relaxed three-miler) and 5K's for fun. We also ran the Bix at Six training run a few weeks prior to the race, so I knew he could do it.

Steve was less confident and asked me if I would run the race with him. That was not my plan, and as visions of my 1:03 finish faded away, I said, "Um, do you want me to?" He nodded and said, "I'm asking you to." It was clear that he needed me, for moral support at least, so I agreed to run the Bix not as a racer, but instead as a coach.

Race morning! Steve woke up feeling more excited than nervous. He declared that his goal was to run the race at 12:00 pace - a more ambitious goal than "finish and not want to die," but one I was sure he could achieve. I made sure he had a good breakfast, both water and coffee,and a couple of Advil. Then we engaged in my favorite pre-race ritual of people watching - cute couples ready to run together, gaunt high school cross country boys, a shirtless guy in denim shorts, and spectators smoking cigarettes and squinting at us uncomprehendingly. The Bix is held at the end of July every year, and really, the end of July in the Midwest is a typically horrible time for running. But the weather was unseasonably cool, in the 70s, with delightful breezes. It was a great day to run, and I wondered if course records would be set.

The gun went off, and about ten minutes later, we crossed the starting line and began our assent of the Brady Street hill. The hill is about 1/4 mile long, with a challenging grade. We spent a lot of time weaving around people who apparently decided to walk it while standing shoulder to shoulder with five of their closest friends. We finished the first mile in just over 12:00, which is excellent given both the hill and the crowds.

Steve was relaxed and comfortable in the second mile. We saw Meb Keflezighi looking fantastic with a huge lead (he went on to win with a blazing time of 32:25). I later found out that Magdalena Lewy Boulet was also racing. It felt great to be running the very same race as such elite athletes! Equally cool, we ran mile two behind a phalanx of firefighters that included two who had been injured in the line of duty and were racing in wheelchairs. At the two mile mark, I heard another runner remark, "That was only two miles? You've got to be kidding me!" Steve still looked great.

People talk about the Brady Street hill when they talk about the Bix, probably because it's big and at the very start of the race. But to me, the hardest part of the course comes in the third and fourth miles, where there are steep rolling hills. Steve was a little quieter, but was still running strong.

At around mile five, Steve asked me to run a little slower. I was proud of him for opting to do that, rather than walking. I babbled away, hoping to distract him by making up a plot for "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" in which the gang runs a 5K. Steve told me later that it was obvious that I was trying to distract him, but that he appreciated it nevertheless. When I told him we had just a mile and a half to go, he was thrilled, not having realized we'd crossed the five mile mark.

Soon, we turned to run back down the big hill. I advised Steve to relax and let the hill do some of the work for him. Some of the runners around us were clearly suffering, but Steve was hanging in there pretty well. I reminded him that we were almost finished, just a mile, less than a mile to go. "You've got this," I told him.

At the bottom of the hill, the finish line was in sight. Steve picked up his pace, knowing that the race was almost over. We crossed the finish line holding hands with a time of 1:19:48.

Steve's 2008 time was 1:33:51. Not only did he finish the race feeling strong, not only did he beat his 12:00 pace goal, but he shaved two minutes per mile off his previous pace! I could not be more proud of him.

My weekend may not have included the PR I was planning, but instead, I got to enjoy running with the two people I love most.

Babyproof No More

As soon as Jack was even thinking about being mobile, Steve and I babyproofed the utter hell out of our house. Every stairway had a gate on it. Every cabinet and drawer in the kitchen was locked. Plug-ins had covers on them, and I bought a cover to keep him from turning off the computer. We even had locks on the toilets to keep him from chucking stuff into them.

When we left our house in Virginia and moved into Stately Wasser Manor, he was two years old and a lot more steady on his feet. We got rid of the gates on the stairs, the locks on the drawers and cabinets, and the plug covers.

But we did keep all of our cleaning products way up high in the pantry. If I needed to run the dishwasher (which it seems like I do every day, rolling that rock up the hill), I have to walk to the pantry to get it, then put it back away again.

This morning, it occurred to me that was unnecessary. I moved all of the kitchen cleaning products to under the sink, where nature intended them to be. This time, my childproofing consisted of a single conversation.

Me: Hey, Jack! See this stuff here?
Jack: Yes.
Me: Leave it alone.
Jack: Of course.

I have felt this many times over the past four and a half years, but Jack really seems to be at an ideal age. He's little and cute and charming, but he can also be quite reasonable.

Race Report: Madison Half Marathon

The night before the Madison half marathon trisko, my cousin Michael's wife Ana (who is Italian and thus a fantastic person to have nearby the night before a race) asked a simple question:

"Why would anyone want to run a marathon or half marathon?"

My brother, running the full, gave the Everest answer - "Because it's there." I expanded on that, saying that a huge part of the appeal of running a long distance race is that it's really hard to do. It's challenging to train for it, and it's even more challenging to complete it. That challenge gives you a tremendous sense of accomplishment that we don't get to experience in our normal day-to-day lives. Andy agreed and said that it feels amazing when you finish, and the beer you drink after a marathon is the greatest one you've ever had.

Little did we know that struggle and challenge would be so much on our minds the next day.

As always, I'm getting ahead of myself.

It had been a challenging couple of weeks. Solid travel for work meant lots of time way from Steve and Jack. Steve had to work Memorial Day weekend, so I decided Madison could be a Mommy-Son roadtrip. It was also a chance to spend some time with some of my favorite family members - my brother, my aunt and uncle, and three of my cousins. In between, I'd throw in a half marathon. Really, what could go wrong?

Andy and I hit the Expo, and I showed tremendous restraint, buying just a new hat with the race logo on it. They also had t-shirts that proclaimed, "Will run for beer, cheese, and brats," and I don't know how Andy resisted the "26.2 Miles? You Betcha!" shirt. In the brief time we were there, Jack convinced my Aunt Phyllis and Uncle Chuck to take him to the brat festival, where he won a stuffed dolphin and three snakes. Good thing, since I think he only brought about 20 stuffed animals from home.

Back at the house, the Italian relatives cooked a huge feast of pasta and bread. It was completely fabulous. It being Wisconsin, there was also a lot of cheese. Excellent.

Jack and I decided to share a bed, which meant about a hundred years of him playing with my hair, having various tigers kiss me goodnight, and me saying over and over, "Quit kicking your legs or I swear, I will make you sleep on the floor." He finally conked out, leaving me to sleep, then wake up at 12:30, 4:00, and finally 5:00 when it was time to get up. Not good.

After bagels and coffee, Uncle Chuck drove Andy and me to the starting line, explaining that we shouldn't have to deal with parking. We did some people watching, enjoyed some pre-race nervous peeing, and I finally bid Andy goodbye to take to the starting line. Madison is an unusual race in that the half starts before the full marathon. It's really a good thing, as it's best to just stay out of each other's hair.

The starting line was really crowded. I actually wasn't able to fit on the pavement and just stood in the dirt and funneled through when the gun went off. No big deal, since it was chip-timed, but I wonder if they'll change that in future yeas.

I ran the first few miles near the 2:00 pacer, figuring I'd run there for a while, then pick it up in the final miles. That was not meant to be. At mile 4, I felt incredibly tired. And not tired legs, my friends. Tired, like, I could take a nap on this comfy pavement tired. Two weeks of travel and poor sleep caught up to me. I felt lousy.

Then, I made a decision: if I wasn't going to run a good time, I might as well have a good time. I made an effort to take in the sights of the very pretty course - we ran past three different lakes, past the Badger football stadium, through lovely neighborhoods, and through University of Wisconsin's campus. The volunteers and spectators were all friendly. It was great.

I finished in 2:06, nine minutes slower than my PR, and one minute slower than my previous slowest time. But what are you going to do?

I met up with Phyllis, Chuck, and Jack so we could watch Andy run. At mile 18 or so, he looked pretty good. At mile 23, he looked okay, too. I ran with him for a few steps and told him where to meet us afterwards. He said he wasn't feeling great, thanks to the remains of a cold he was fighing. Then we headed to the finish line. I saw lots of people who had been running around where Andy was, and Jack and I had fun cheering for them. But no Andy. I was worried. I know that a lot can go wrong in just 3 miles.

But finally, he was there. I yelled, "Go, Andy! Don't let them run out of beer!" Jack chased after Andy and ran with him for a little while, which Andy later said actually helped him.

Chuck went to find Andy at the meeting spot and he was nowhere to be found. I grabbed Jack and went to look for him. My fear, which I didn't share with anyone, was that he might be in the medical tent. Thank Yoda he was okay - my cell phone rang a minute later. It was my mom - Andy borrowed someone's cell phone and called her to tell me where he was. Andy explained that yes, I'd told him where to meet, but that in those last three miles it fell out of his brain. Totally understandable. He, too, was far beyond his goal time.

The good thing is, he kept it all in perspective, just as I was working to do. Sometimes, it's just not your day. Neither of us was racing under peak conditions.

And remember what I said before about part of the appeal of racing long distances being how hard it can be? Well, because it's hard, sometimes you're not going to succeed. If you hit your goal or set a PR every time you toe the line, then you're not setting tough enough goals. Finishing a race strong and getting a PR is an amazing feeling; I know since it happened to me just a few weeks ago. But the other side of the coin is real, too. There is some value, even some satisfaction that can come from working hard at something and not making the mark.

Race Report: Imagination Library 5K

One of the things that definitely rocks about running half marathons triskos is that I can easily work other races into my training - even into recovery. So, less than a week after my Total Trisko Triumph, I ran the Imagination Library 5K as a training run with Steve.

Steve, as faithful Coffee Betsy readers know, is training for the Bix 7 with the admirable goal of not feeling like he is going to die when it's over. I'm scheduling some 5K races not so much for speedwork, but more to make things fun. I decided we should run together, partly so I'd remember to keep my pace slow enough for a recovery run, partly because Steve is fun to hang out with.

When we arrived at the starting line, I was a little bit bummed that I wasn't truly racing it. The weather was kind of lousy - cold and really windy, which made for a poor turnout. A 5K with a poor turnout is totally in my wheelhouse, and looking at the times for my age group, I probably would have finished second. But no matter - the point was to have fun, and that we did.

The race started at a park by the Mississippi River, then followed the bike/running path at a simple out and back. It turns out it's a good thing there weren't many people there, because things were getting mighty crowded in the middle of the pack where we were hanging. I wonder if they will have to alter the course in the future.

It was great to be able to go for a run with Steve, something we used to do together a lot, but haven't done much in a long time. It was especially well timed because I'd just returned from a three-day work trip in Charlotte and was gearing up for a week of more trips. A 5K may not provide a lot of time for us to just hang out together, but it was a nice start.

We hit the three mile mark, and my mom and Jack were there cheering for us like crazy. We waved Jack over so he could finish the race with us, and that thrilled him. The three of us crossed the line together holding hands.

The thing that surprised me the most about the race was that it was swag-tastic. We got the typical cotton t-shirts, which featured a cute picture of a running book, but our goodie bags also included Cliff or Luna bars, coupons for free Chick-Fil-A sandwiches, and best of all free tickets to go to a Quad City River Bandits baseball game! They even had finisher's medals, and the volunteer was kind enough to give one to Jack even though he'd run bandit - they must have had plenty. After the race, there were more Cliff and Luna bars, bottles of water with BioFreeze samples tied to them, and all kinds of food. They also had bounce castles and were getting ready to set up craft tables and face painting. I felt bad for the organizers because the weather was so lousy that people didn't really stick around afterwards like they would have. I hope they try again next year and have better weather. I'll be there for sure.

Dose of Cute

You know what this blog means?

I mean, besides more frequently updated content? And sponsors clamoring to give me cool free stuff to review?

More cuteness. And thus, I bring you an update on Spring at Stately Wasser Manor.



Jack's school put on a circus a few weeks ago, and Jack was an acrobat. Let me tell you, it was worth the price of admission (free) just to hear Jack repeatedly say the word "acrobat" when he was practicing his moves at home. He didn't pronounce it wrong, but let me tell you, there was quite a lot of effort and concentration behind it. Anyway, the circus itself was wall-to-wall adorable, with kids acting like elephants, lions, cowboys, tightrope walkers, strongmen, and of course, acrobats. Jack, in his glittery vest and headband (not to mention handlebar moustache) executed forward rolls, jumped on a trampoline, then stood at the top of a human pyramid of fellow acrobats with a triumphant "Ta da!"

Easter weekend immediately followed. We took Jack to an egg hunt at the zoo, and really, the word "hunt" should not be used to describe these events. The grass in a roped off area is covered in eggs, and the kids go and pick them up. There is no actual hunting involved... though Jack, ever thorough in his quest for candy, looked under every blade of grass to make sure he got them all. He then brought his bounty home to his "candy stash," which is a big plastic container that he puts behind the chair in the living room. Since he somehow manages to defy kid-dom and not eat it by the fistfull, we indulge this. The Saturday before Easter, Jack and I made a bunny cake. I post not one, but two pictures of it because I am really proud of how well it turned out. I am really good at baking and can absolutely bake a cake that tastes good, but it is rare for me to come up with something that also looks good. Easter morning featured an egg hunt in which Jack had to actually hunt for the eggs. I will always remember his first Easter, in which the Easter bunny scattered about ten plastic eggs in Jack's immediate sight on the living room floor. The eggs did not contain candy, as the bunny knew he didn't eat it yet, but instead were filled with binkies. This time around, Jack got a ton of candy, which he used to further stock the Candy Stash. He also posed for this picture and managed to look like right after he got his Easter basket, he changed out of his frog jammies and went to fight in the Civil War. We also introduced Jack to the bounty that is a brunch buffet, and he did an admirable job of putting down scrambled eggs, fruit, raw veggies, ham, and tater tots.


I am now officially a soccer mom, as Jack is participating in the Little Strikers soccer program. He's on the same team as several of his friends, and their team name is the Tigers. ("Just like Roary, Mommy!") Steve is the assistant coach, which is a good thing indeed, as the main coach didn't know anything at all about soccer and forgot to tell the kids things like that the goalie can use her hands. The Tigers had their first game on Tuesday, and it was hilarious to watch. I had to be careful about cheering for Jack, because he had a tendency to stop, turn to me, and give me a thumbs up. He's having a great time playing, especially because it turns out you get ice cream afterwards.

Last but not least in the Cuteness Review, my parents were in town and took the three of us to a Japanese steakhouse for dinner. It was prom night, and Jack was completely mesmerized by the girls, with their brightly colored fancy dresses and elaborate hairdos. Jack went up to three different girls and said, "Um, excuse me? You look really beautiful, just like a princess." The girls completely melted and thought he was the most adorable thing ever. I felt a bit sorry for their dates, who probably failed to say anything half as charming to the girls. And really, it's awfully hard to compete with a line like that and a look like this.

Running Philosophy

Being a distance runner doesn't just change your body. It also changes your outlook.

Jack and I were playing outside a few days ago. He rode his trike about three houses away from ours and declared that he was exhausted and could not possibly ride alllll the way back to Stately Wasser Manor.

He chose the wrong person to try to sell that one to.

Instead of getting a piggyback ride back to the house, he got a lecture about how sometimes you get tired, but you still need to dig deep, find strength, and keep going. And how if you ever want to win at anything, you need to keep trying, not give up, and never quit - or you will never have a chance.

Wouldn't you know it, he managed to find the power to move that 100 feet back home, probably just so I'd shut up about it.

Then, last night, I was watching The Amazing Race. The teams were in China and had to endure a foot massage, which was apparently quite painful. There was much yelling and gnashing of teeth, but all I could think was that, sure, it probably hurt a lot. I believed that. But the massage was only 10 minutes. It couldn't be so difficult to endure something for just 10 minutes.

Then, the racers went to the pool where Michael Phelps won his pile of gold medals. They needed to run a 400 meter relay, and my goodness, there was quite a lot of complaining about how hard it was, how exhausted they were, and so on. Then, they showed the finishing times. The slowest team finished in 18 minutes - that means they each swam for 9 minutes total, with breaks while the other team member swam. Swimming is hard, no doubt, but again, it just isn't that much total effort to do what needs to be done.

Running has taught me the importance of tenacity. Even if something seems difficult, chances are, it's not something that needs to be endured for that long. I can suck it up, and I can do it.

Running Like Crazy

So, yeah. It has officially been forever since I have posted anything. I have been so catlicking busy that although there is plenty to report, I just haven’t managed to find a second to sit down and write anything. Clearly, this situation calls for some bullet points.
• The new job is going well, but it’s keeping me very busy. I am learning a lot, as evidenced by my getting on a plane my second week of work and flying to Minneapolis, coming home for the weekend, then flying out again.
• I didn’t get to go to the Mall of America, nor did I run into Prince.
• However, one morning I got up early and went for a run. I discovered a park near my hotel where there was a running path that surrounded a beautiful frozen lake. Running around a frozen lake felt very Minnesota to me. I’m sure if I’d gone for another mile or two, I’d have run into Garrison Keillor.
• The boys and I went out for dinner the other night and Jack, with no preamble, picked up a crayon and wrote his name, all by himself, for the very first time. I am incredibly proud of him. He now has a Spider-Man notebook that he calls his sketchbook where he practices drawing and writing.
• Jack has also taken a step into kid-dom in that he is willing to help me clean the house for money. He will gladly accept any coin for any job and keeps them all in a bowl in his room. He thinks he is totally rich, though the amount of money he has amassed in his four years is about six bucks.
• Jack’s class at school has a new pet guinea pig, and I am delighted to report that her name is Miss Piggy. The teacher read them all a book about guinea pigs, and Jack pretty much committed it to memory. Steve and I have now deemed him The World’s Foremost Expert on Guinea Pigs. Jack will be delighted to bust out a number of facts about guinea pigs, such as that they need to chew on hard things to keep their teeth from getting too long, that when they are excited, they bounce up and down, which is called “popcorning,” and that celery is dangerous for them to eat because of the strings.
• Two new catch-phrases have entered the lexicon at Stately Wasser Manor. Instead of making sure, we are “make suring,” and if you want to tell someone you’re being honest, you’ll say, “I’m really true.” Jack’s turns of phrase really tickle me.
• I’ve decided not to run the half marathon I was planning on in early April. With the new job, I’ve been getting in decent miles in my weekend long runs, but I haven’t been as consistent in speed work. So, then new plan is to just train for the Quad Cities Distance Classic in May. I will have plenty of time to train for that, buying me time to miss a few training sessions as I need to.
• As part of that goal, I went on my first group training run on Sunday. We all met bright and surly in the morning, despite Daylight Savings Time and the fact that it was pouring rain. It’s nice to be with a group of people who are also crazy enough to think that’s a good idea. I hung with some nice people for the first 3.5 miles, but they were ready to turn around before I was , so I kept on going. Trouble was, the people ahead of me were WAY ahead of me, and the people running slower than me had turned around earlier, so I got a little lost. I was trying out the “return to start” feature on Paula Garmin when one of the faster runners joined me and helped me find my way back.
• After the training run, we all hung out at McDonald’s. Let me tell you, a group of runners really stands out in the crowd there. It was a lot of fun, and everyone was really friendly. Internet, if you are reluctant to join a running group because you don’t know anybody, don’t be. Runners are really nice people and are always willing to welcome another into the fold. Seriously.
• The day before that training run, I went to my Local Running Store and got a new pair of shoes (Asics 2140’s, if you care). My husband went with me because he was curious about what the store was like. He followed me in and listened for a few minutes while I chatted with the guy there. About one minute in, Steve realized that he had no clue what running store guy and I were talking about. All kinds of Asics serial numbers, discussion of “hot spots” on the feet, and he decided to wait for me outside instead!

Those are the highlights of what's going on here. I'll try not to be such a stranger!

The Nightly Surprise

Every night, Steve and I peek in and check on Jack before we go to sleep. He's so cute cuddled up to his tigers, and it gives me an opportunity to give him and extra kiss.

Lately, this ritual has also been an unexpected source of entertainment.

A few nights ago, we checked on Jack, only to discover that this pajamas were crumpled at the foot of the bed and he was sleeping stark naked.

I have a four-year-old who sleeps in the nude, apparently.

I actually do know where he got the idea of sleeping naked. In Star Wars, Episode III, we see a shirtless Anakin sit up in bed after a nightmare. Jack wondered why he was naked; I explained that he just wasn't wearing a shirt and that sometimes grownups do that.

As would naturally follow, Jack did the same thing... in the dead of winter, on a night that I pretty much slept in a parka.

A few nights later, we heard some commotion up in his room, but since he stayed there and settled down pretty quickly, we let it go. Then, when we went to check on him, Jack was not in his bed. Instead, he had dragged his pillow and blanket onto the floor next to his bed, where he was sleeping, clutching a flashlight and surrounded by boys. The next morning, he explained that he went on a campout in his room.

Last night, again there was a lot of commotion (Jack does not have a future career as a ninja). It went on for so long, that Steve went upstairs to talk to him. Jack had locked his door and got very quiet when he heard Daddy's approach. He said in a wee, innocent voice that he was up to "No-sing" and agreed to settle down.

About an hour later, Steve said he wanted to go check on Jack - the suspense was killing him.

Jack was in his bed...

Dressed...

in his Santa Claus suit.

The Future of the Academy

I never expected that this would happen so soon, but that ample free time I've had on my hands, due to circumstances not of my choosing? Is soon coming to an end.

I feel extremely grateful and fortunate. I am absolutely thrilled to move on to the next thing - and to get my normal life back.

I am also sad that I won't have as much time with Jack as I have had. Betsy-Jack Academy has been, as Jack would say, very special to me. We have one more week left, which will be spent focused on Valentine's Day and love, which seems appropriate.

My new goal is to keep the Academy alive, with weekend sessions. I will plan out different activities for the two of us to do together. We both love it, and it beats the heck out of spending my Sundays doing lightsaber battle-fights.

Betsy-Jack Academy

Due to circumstances not of my choosing, I suddenly find myself with a lot of time on my hands. I've been working hard to use that time wisely - taking care of Stately Wasser Manor, running, but above all, spending more time with Jack.

Instead of going to school on Wednesdays, he now spends the day with me. I know that if I left things to chance, Jack and I would wile away the entire day having lightsaber battle-fights and I would completely lose my mind.

This was the inspiration for Betsy-Jack Academy. He may not be going to school on Wednesdays with his friends, but he is spending the day with me learning. I choose a theme for each week and pull together activities, projects, and books to go with that theme. So far we have studied snow, the five senses, and yesterday's huge hit, Fairy Tales.

We start the day with a trip to the Family Museum, where they have an exercise class for kids Jack's age that is completely free. Unfortunately for me, the activity mainly focuses on dance. I suspect that I am objectively the most athletic mom there, but you sure wouldn't know it to look at me when I struggle to touch my toes and repeat my one dance move over and over again. I kept wanting to ask when we were going to do the 400 meter track repeats. To make matters worse, I actually strained my left calf galloping like a horse. But no matter - it's fun to get out of the house and do something active.

After the museum, Jack and I made lunch together. He is very interested in learning how to cook, which is excellent, because as far as I'm concerned one of my main duties as a parent is to make sure I don't raise some dumbass college student who doesn't know how to fold laundry or make anything other than spaghetti and ramen noodles.

Next, we read books. With the fairy tale theme, it was really easy to find great reading material. I was impressed by how quickly Jack understood fairy tales as a literary genre - he came up with the fact that most end with "and they lived happily ever after" all on his own. He also understood that they include elements of magic and often feature princes and princesses and was able to come up with several examples. Future English major? We also talked about how these stories have been told and re-told for a very long time, so there are often different versions of the same story. Again, Jack got the concept right away, giving the example of how, sometimes the Big Bad Wolf eats the first two pigs and sometimes they escape to the third pig's house.

We took a movie break, but that too was within our theme. I rented a DVD of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse stories with a fairy tale bent, which gave us another opportunity to talk about different ways of telling these stories.

The most fun part of our day was Art. First, we made piggy noses for The Three Little Pigs. I cut out pieces of egg carton, then we colored them, added pig nostrils, and I attached elastic to them so they'd go around your head. Jack decided we should make them in all different colors, not just pink, so Jack made a red one for himself, orange for Roary, and so on. Garfield (Roary's daddy) was the Big Bad Wolf.


Then we made puppets. Jack has really enjoyed The Frog Prince, so we made the frog, the princess, and the prince.




Finally, no Betsy-Jack Academy is complete without some baking. We made sugar cookies in the shape of frog princes (I have a tremendous collection of cookie cutters).


When Steve got home, we presented The Three Little Pigs as a play, starring Emmy as the Mommy pig, Nicey, Roary, and Jack as the three little pigs, and Garfield as the Big Bad Wolf. I was the narrator, but I wore a pig nose of my own. Jack did a fantastic job, and Steve was really impressed.

It was a great day at Betsy-Jack Academy.

Scenes from Stately Wasser Manor

Steve: You're not going running tomorrow, are you?
Betsy: ...
Steve: Betsy, the weather report used the words "dangerously cold" to describe tomorrow's temperatures. It's not even going to get to zero.
Betsy: But...
Steve: Seriously, it's a bad idea. Promise me you won't do it.
Betsy: Fine, I'll go to the gym and run on the catlicking treadmill.

Jack Wasser's Big Adventure, Part 2

Since Jack took off for the wilds of Southern Illinois on Tuesday, I've been keeping in touch with him with daily phone calls.

The kid is having a freaking blast.

Every day, he talks my ear off, all about how he went swimming three times, went on a hike with Poppa, has a new Lightning McQueen sleeping bag there, played with his glamorous older cousin Devin's old toys, and on and on.

There has not been a single hint of tears or "I miss you, Mommy."

This is a good thing. Because meanwhile, Steve and I have been having a great time, too. Things are awfully relaxed here, and I have time to do things like put cages around my tomatoes before work, sit around and read a magazine, fold laundry without a "helper," and go for long walks with Steve.

I think that Jack's Big Adventure will have lasted the ideal amount of time. He's having lots of special grandparent time, Steve and I got a break, and although none of us are pining for the other, we will all be happy to see each other later today.

There is just one hazard to having Jack spend all this time with his grandparents. Mr. Jackson W. Crazypants is now the proud owner of a lightsaber. A lightsaber of his very own was an inevitable purchase that Steve and I were attempting to delay. We'd point to the "Ages 4 and Up" on the package and lament that he couldn't have one yet. Not because we thought he'd hurt himself, but because we dreaded spending every waking moment of our days having "battle-fights" with Jack.

But now, battle-fight we will. Steve went to Target last night, and now all three of us have lightsabers.

Jack Wasser's Big Adventure

For ages now, my dad and stepmom have been talking about how great it would be for Jack to come stay with them for an extended visit. My nephew has been doing that for years, and I know how special that time is both for my dad and Vickie and for Devin. The question to me, really, was when Jack would be ready for a solo trip.

Then, a few months ago, Jack announced, "I have good idea, Mommy." That is, that he would go visit Mawmaw and Poppa, stay there by himself, and then Mommy and Daddy would come get him after "a couple whiles."

Well, okay, then.

My dad drove up last night, and this morning, he and Jack took off for Jack's big vacation. Steve and I will drive down on Friday, spend the weekend there, then take Jack home.

The little man was VERY excited this morning. He and I were eating breakfast, and as soon as he saw that Poppa was putting his stuff in the car, Jack told me that he was "all full," clearly sated from three bites of Kung Fu Panda waffles. Next thing you know, he'd gotten dressed in lightning speed and was in the car, blowing me kisses and hugs.

I know he'll have a great time with his grandparents, and I know that we will miss each other. The only thing I don't know?

What on earth am I going to do with all of this free time?

The Next Challenge

I'm happy to say that Jack is starting to figure some things out. For example, there are foods out there besides french fries and ice cream that not only will not cause his death, but might, in fact, be tasty. On Sunday alone, he tried three new foods. We got some fresh apricots at the grocery store and because they were "so cute," Jack agreed to taste them. Then he ate all five. I gave him some red pepper strips with his dinner, and he informed me that, "I don't yike red peppers," but after I told him he did not have to eat them, he did without complaint. Even better, Steve convinced him to try one of the world's greatest foods, ribs. "I yike ribs," Jack said happily, and I had him call my dad with the good news.

Now if only we could get him to try something completely off the wall, such as CEREAL, we'd really have something.

Last night, Jack informed me that he was not going to sleep in a Pull-Up. The kid has been successfully potty-trained during the day for quite a while, and I have to admit that 99% of the time, he wakes up in the morning completely dry. But I also really like not having to change sheets in the middle of the night, so I was prepared to do Pull-Ups indefinitely. Jack informed me politely and reasonably that his body is indeed ready to go all night and that he would not be needing a Pull-Up any more.

"But what if you go in the middle of the night," I asked. Jack said that he would get up, go to the bathroom, and go back to bed. Um, okay. If you say so. Sure enough, last night was successful. "I am all done with Pull-Ups," Jack informed me triumphantly. Too bad that happened immediately after I spent ten bucks on a new bag of them, but whatever.

The little man is also expressing more and more of an interest in learning to read and write. Last night, he and I spent a long time practicing writing the letter J. It is unfortunate that the kid happens to have his name start with a letter that is kind of hard to draw, but we kept on working on the line on top with a hook at the bottom. He definitely doesn't have it yet, but the desire is there.


Yes, I know those are numbers, but you get the idea.

As he and I were working on letters, then making a mixed media collage (ie coloring book page involving crayons, colored pencils, and marker with stickers on it), he'd occasionally grab a carrot stick to munch on. I looked like the greatest mom the world has ever known. I will have to remember that moment the next time I hit the Hell With It button and give him a bowl of marshmallows and put him in front of the TV.

Still, we don't have everything quite figured out yet. Jack decided a while back that he doesn't need to take a nap anymore. However, all evidence points to the contrary, particularly when he is tired to the point where he has screaming fits and attempts to hit me and throw shoes at Steve. The kid needs to take a nap, and we all need to work a little harder to make it happen.

Last night after work, Steve and I had a Team Meeting with my mom and Doug, who take care of Jack on Mondays and Tuesdays. We agreed to attempt a nap at 12:30 and keep trying for 40 minutes. Jack is to stay in his room for 90 minutes, at which time his alarm will go off. We aren't going to make him sleep - if he wants to stay in a darkened room and play with Roary and Susie, so be it, but we are hoping he will get bored and give in to the urge to nap.

Starting today, his sticker chart will no longer be for staying in bed at night, but rather for staying in bed at naptime. He's down with the plan and is eager to earn enough stickers to get his Superman and Krypto action figure set. Here's hoping that The Great Nap Crackdown of 2008 is successful.

Squishable

This morning, Steve told Jack that we are getting ceiling fans installed in our bedroom and in his. The new ceiling fan, Steve said, would help keep Jack cool and comfortable at night. Jack's wee face then lit up, and he said:

And it will blow all of the nightmares out of my room, Daddy! Those nightmares won't be able to stay because they will just fly away.

Sometimes I just want to squish that little guy.

Ray, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES!

When I get home from a run, Jack always greets me with, "Did you have a good run, Mommy?" which delights me to no end. Lately, he has been following up that question with, "Did you win?"

One school of thought would be that I should answer thusly:

Sweetie, when I go running, most of the time, it's not a race. What I'm doing is improving my fitness, enjoying the fresh air, and relieving stress so I can be a better mommy. I do have goals, but instead of challenging someone else, I am really challenging myself. And with that, I am always a winner.

However, I prefer this approach:

Yes.

I mean, come on: did you see anybody finish ahead of me?

Don't Forget

This week, I have officially started my training for the Quad Cities Marathon. My training program is much more challenging this time around, and I am fully counting on logging a PR.

But this weekend? I am skipping my long run of 13 miles. Instead, I am running a 5K. And no, I am not going to just use that 5K as a speed workout. In fact, I plan on turning in what will probably be a Personal Worst for the 5K. I may even take some walk breaks. I could do my long run on Sunday, but I'm not going to.

Saturday is my 11th wedding anniversary. My fabulous, wonderful, supportive, world's greatest running cheerleader husband wants to run Race for the Cure with me to kick off our day of fun. What, am I going to ditch him and race to the finish? No, some things are more important.

Sunday is Father's Day. Steve is such a loving and accomodating husband that he actually said that surely we could spare a few hours for me to get in a run on Sunday. The very fact that he offered that proves to me that he more than deserves a full day of love and attention from me and Jack.

The fact of the matter is, I can go a weekend without a quality run, and I will still be able to finish the marathon - and I suspect, still get my PR.

More importantly, I don't have to do any of this. Running is supposed to be fun; it's not my job. I am not going to win this race, get an age group award, or even qualify for Boston. There are a lot of reasons that I run - stress relief, to challenge myself, to improve my health, to get time to myself, to be able to eat more ice cream, because I love the smell of wet sidewalks on a rainy day...

If I skip a long run to spend a special weekend with my family, I will still get every one of those benefits.

The theme for this week's Take It and Run Thursday is "As you start your marathon (or half marathon) training, don't forget..."

My advice is simple: don't forget why you do this.

Face it, Tiger: You just hit the jackpot.

Two years ago, a miraculous transformation took place. Roary went from being Random Stuffed Cat/Tiger Sitting On The Coffee Table to Jack’s Best Friend – and a valued part of our family. So valued, in fact, that for the second time, we celebrated Roary’s birthday.

I’m happy to say that this year, Roary did not have to help Jack through any surgeries or trips to the emergency room. He did, however, stick with Jack through his the move to Stately Wasser Manor, the transition to his Big Boy Bed, a new school, and potty training. Roary and Jack play together, take naps together, and argue like brothers. When Jack is tired or stressed, he has been known to yell, “Roary! I need you!” And one of my favorite moments ever in my life came on our trip to Disney World. Jack asked Steve how we were able to hear Jiminy Cricket’s voice during the fireworks. Steve said that it was magic. Jack pointed up in the sky and said, “Look, Roary: Magic.”



Jack’s understanding of Roary’s importance has deepened in this past year. About a month ago, I heard Jack’s panicked yell from the bathroom. Acting purely on instinct, I found myself rapidly removing a pile of sodden orange fur from the toilet – Jack dropped Roary as it was flushing.

It was quite a while before Jack found the humor in that situation. He clung to Roary (who I’d secretly swapped for a clean, dry model) and thanked me for rescuing him. “Roary, you could have been lost,” he said tearfully. “You’re part of our family.”

Amazingly, that family has grown. Steve and Jack went to Barnes and Noble last week and found a selection of Roaries, who Jack immediately decided were Roary’s family and should read books with them. When it came time to put the tigers away and say goodbye to them, Jack started to move slowly. He replaced all of the tigers but one.
“Daddy,” he said, “I really want to take this tiger home with us. She is Roary’s mommy and Roary needs his mommy. And then she would be part of our family too.”
Steve listened carefully, and he could tell that Jack was being completely sincere. He was not trying to score a new tiger, so much as he was looking out for his friend. Sure enough, when Jack came home, he held Roary’s mommy over his head and announced, “Ta-da! This is Roary’s mommy and she is part of our family now and her name is Susie!” The Roary and Susie hugged and kissed.



A little while later, Jack grew pensive. He realized that Susie still had her whiskers, but that Roary’s are long gone. It made him sad to think that his friend was missing his whiskers. So, I explained to Jack that he had loved Roary’s whiskers off, and that is what happens to friends who are special to us. I showed him Rexa, who was my special dinosaur when I was a little girl, and the place under her chin where I rubbed off all of the green. I told him that it doesn’t hurt Rexa, just like the missing whiskers don’t hurt Roary, because it reminds them of how much we love them. This made Jack feel better – so much better, in fact, that the next day he removed Susie’s whiskers so that he would know she was loved, too.



We celebrated Roary’s birthday like a family: with cupcakes (marble, so they’d be striped like Roary) with orange icing (Roary’s favorite color) that we decorate with jungle animal candies and black icing stripes. I don’t recommend the black icing, but I do recommend spending a birthday with loved ones.



Happy birthday, Roary, and welcome to the family, Susie.

Trisko Update

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Friends, the trisko is looming. I will run my very first half marathon (unless you count the two half marathons that composed last fall's full marathon) on Sunday, May 11.

Training for a trisko is really different from training for a full marathon. I have long runs to do, but they just aren't that long. And because the distance isn't quite so punishing, there is no taper - and no accompanying taper madness.

Two Saturdays ago, I ran a 10 mile run that kicked my heiney-butt all over the place. I was tired and had to stop to walk a couple of times. Every injury I have ever had in my entire life came back to say hello - except for the shin pain that had me so worried. It was like, "Knee pain? What the hell - you haven't been around since January. What are you doing here? And now you, hip pain? You went away in November, and you sure as Yoda are not coming back now."

But the good thing is, this is not my first big race, so I know that every once in a while, I'm going to have a bad run. Because on Saturday, I ran 11 miles, rocked it out, and felt completely fine afterwards. Just hungry.

I am also considerably more prepared for the race than I was for my marathon last fall. I've reviewed the course map, and it features a big-ass hill towards the beginning of the race. The hill is on 4th Street in Moline, and Stately Wasser Manor is on 3rd Street. That means that there is absolutely no reason for me to not make that hill my bitch. I plan my training runs now so that I have to run up that hill at some point - usually when I'm fatigued. I'll have to post a picture of the monster so that you will all be impressed by how bad-ass I am.

Less bad-ass is the fact that the time I took off for my hurt shin has made me change my goals.

Old Goal: 2:00 or less, in preparation for a 4:00 marathon in the fall.

New Goal: Whatever.